Leapy Lee - chart topping singer of the 1960s and 70s

Every week I write and article for the Euro Weekly News, an English-speaking newspaper covering all the major resorts of Spain and the Balearics. You can pick up a copy on a Thursday ... or read it here every week.

Thursday 5 October 2006

I'm innocent I tell you.

I don't mind the slings and poisoned arrows of outrageous readers, in fact I rather revel in some of them, but when they're completely unfounded I do tend to twitch a bit. So Ms or Mr R. Hayward (Letters to Ms Ed last week) who wrote accusing me of making light of the kidnapping of the tragic Natascha Kampusch; I can quite categorically inform you, that at no time have I even broached on the subject of this young lady, leave alone made light of her almost unbelievable incarceration, and I do in fact take umbrage at the accusation. Contrary to the belief of people like you, I never make fun of unfortunates or people life has treated unkindly, and have strict moral self imposed guide lines in all these areas. So Senor or Senora Haywood, may I suggest that the next time you get the urge to scribe your vitriolic, rather sad opinions to a newspaper, you endeavour to get your facts right at the outset - 'Basta Ya', ok?

Ooh some people really get up my nose. Mind you not quite as far up as a particular doctor got with Ms Ida who phoned me from Alicante last week. Ida is an old age pensioner who tells me she moved to Spain because she was fed up with the state Britain had fallen into. The final straw came when her son, feeling unwell, visited his local doctor for the first time. The doctor of Asian origin had an accent so pronounced that her son simply couldn't understand a word of his diagnosis. To polite to complain, he simply left and went home. A week later, still feeling unwell he went back to the surgery. He then asked the receptionist if it were possible to see another doctor as he simply couldn't understand what the first had advised him. His request was denied and he had to see the same man, with the same obvious result. One week later he received a letter from the surgery advising him that he had been struck off their patients list as he was a racist! 'Owd ya like some of them apples? Not much to add to that is there. The mind truly doth boggle.

Another truly wonderful offering from our illustrious PC brigade this week was the ruling that it is no longer correct to use the word yobbo to describe the louts who infest our society. Because - and wait for it, because it may hurt their feelings! You couldn't make it up could you?

Luckiest award of the week has to go to singer George Michael. Once again found 'slumped' over the wheel of his car, this time disrupting traffic. He was deemed to be extremely stoned and subsequently also found to be in possession of marihuana - and he gets off with a caution! Just a minute, if he's at the traffic lights (actually passing out while waiting for the light to change) presumably he must have been driving to get to that point, so what about the driving under the influence bit? I'll tell you, if that had been you or I we'd have been for sure looking at a court case and almost certainly finished up with a fine and a ban. I actually find police inconsistency concerning so called celebbrities severely mind boggling. Remember some weeks ago I mentioned the fact that in the cases of footballer hooliganism the police almost always said they were 'considering prosecution' and then did sweet F.A.? Have you heard one word from them since they voiced exactly that sentiment after the atrocious forearm smash delivered by that footballing thug Ben Thatcher? 'Course you haven't. I rest my case.

And that's about it. Belated, but never the less sincere condolences to local entertainer Arthur at the tragic passing of his beloved Christine. The amount of people who attended the funeral spoke in droves of the popularity of this sadly missed lady and we pray Arthur can find the strength to somehow come to terms with his sad loss.

On an 'up' note, many congrats to Ren and Jill Bertorelli who now reside on Mallorca, but who some of you may remember as being part of the famous Bertorelli family who ran their highly acclaimed restaurants at Covent Garden and Queensway in London during the 50's and 60's. Ren and Jill last week celebrated their 40 th wedding anniversary, and grand old knees up was had by all. I dunno Jill how 'ave you managed to put up with him for all that time! Altogether now. 'We've been together nah for forty years ...' Bless you both. So it's goodbye from him and goodbye from him. Keep those emails coming. Keep those corners turned up, but whatever ya do, always.

Keep the faith.
Love Leapy

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